Shout outs to the Real Men!!!
Yesterday we celebrated Father’s day. As the day approached I heard quite a few people talking about it. How they celebrate, who they celebrate and things like that. I also heard a few people talking about how some deadbeats have a tendency to surface around that time… trying to get some acknowledgement… AS IF!!! (Yes I know how ditzy that sounds, but that’s what came to mind).
Now that it’s Monday, in most cases the celebration of dad is over. The focus will now shift back to those who are not around. This does not just stay with the fathers. We do that all around. We focus the ones not doing the right things and not the ones standing tall and holding it down. When is CNN going to do a special on the dad who goes to work and comes home to his children and their mother every day? The brothers who stay in school and get those degrees? All the fellas who do the dang thing. I guess they’re too busy celebrating the guys dropping the ball.
It is believed that people would not watch it if they did a special on people doing the right thing. Wow… Do we really enjoy feeding on negativity that much? Personally, I’m a bit annoyed that they think we have nothing better to do than watch other’s pain. Then again, the rating folks probably can’t even tell when I turn off my TV. But my issue though is how do we give props to the men who do their manly things?
I know some great guys, sons, brothers, dads, husbands, friends, boyfriends. Just amazing men! I know that I’m not the only one who knows these guys. We all know a few, but for whatever reason they don’t get enough credit. Instead of making a big deal out of the guy who was up all night with his sick child, we focus on the one who was not there. Instead of the guy who rubs our tummy when it hurts, we hear of the one who doesn’t call.
As a child psychotherapist, I and many others I know in the field work with parents and teachers to get them to encourage positive behaviors. Make a big deal when a child does something great and not so much at their bad behaviors. This encourages the ones who are already doing well and motivates those who aren’t doing well to make changes because they want the attention. As much as society jokes about these ball dropping guys being like children who knows?
I’m not saying it’s gonna suddenly make every guy want to change or anything like that, but I want us to make a big deal of the good guys. Facebook, I challenge you to make a big deal of the good guys.
Some of my tops… My brothers – Didier, Ben, Bill, Yve… My cousins – Can’t name them all – Grandpa was a busy guy. DAS, Uncles, friends and other relatives… I am surrounded by great guys… You are too…
To all of you guys I dedicate Heather Headley’s He Is …
I’m shouting a few of them… add yours in the comments. Shout ‘em out on Faccebook with your comments!!!
I’m just saying though…
Dream Big… Live Bigger…
DrJudiC
www.drjudic.com
Phenomenal Women
I was at a career fair yesterday and met so many people. It was encouraging to see how many people were plugging away at trying to get that next gig. To these folks I must say Way To Go!!! There were many people there who had been through the mills with trying to make things happen. Today I’m shoutin’ out the Phenomenal Women who are out there holding things together. You are keeping the world moving even when there is a lot of pushing and pulling required of you. We are truly blessed even when things are not going the way we want them to.
My charge to each one of you today is to do something nice for someone else. Assert the power of your greatness. Make someone smile today. Give a compliment. If you know someone who is in the market for a job right now call them and give them some encouragement. It’s hard to be in the hunt in this market, but with the support of people around them, they can be positive another day. After that, say a special prayer of thanksgiving for yourself and others around you. If you are in the job market, I am proud of you for hanging in there. Even when you don’t know it I pray for you, and encourage you to continue doing the same.
Ladies, I dedicate your favorite India Arie song to you today… Play it out, because today it is your song.
I appreciate you all.
I’m just saying though…
Dream Big… Live Bigger…
DrJudiC
www.drjudic.com
New heroes for the babies…
I recently attended a forum where I heard something disturbing (I know… It’s starting to sound like I attend a lot of meetings). I don’t think it was so much what was said that bothered me, but more that this was not the first time. One of the panelist commented that there were not enough role models for our youth outside the entertainment industry. It’s not every child who is going to be the next Jay-Z, Tom Brady or Randy Moss. Locally in Palm Beach County we do have home grown talents like Vince Wilfork and Devin Hester who have been making big plays in the NFL over the past few years. Each of these men were on a high school teams with many other young athletes, but we’re not keeping up with their careers.
Is it that we don’t have role models or are we not showcasing them? How many athletes do you know are now doing great things in the community? There are many of them. There are more young athletes from all sports who don’t get drafted out of high school and college then the ones who do. We can’t forget the entertainment industry. Lights! Camera! Action! Mic check 1-2 1-2. Many people left these things behind and have pursued fulfilling careers where they are making a difference in our communities, but they don’t get the lime light. The youth in turn don’t get exposed to them. They don’t get to see the great running back who is a doctor; the star wrestler who is an attorney; the singer who now loves teaching her students; the actor who works with community youth… you get the picture. They don’t get the recognition for making a change in the community.
Many people in our society have become too focused on money. Last time I heard a group asked what success meant to them, more than 75% (probably more) of their responses was about having money. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying I don’t want money. I’ll pick a dollar off the ground before giving it a single thought, but I know there are other things in life. My point is more that when we glorify having an exorbitant amount, we show kids that success means having a lot of money.
We should really show these kids that they can throw a ball and then grow up to be CEOs. Technicians, mechanics – If you don’t believe they can make a good living, check your bill (and don’t act like I’m the only one that’s ever been taken for that ride).
It’s great to have children grow up and do the things that they like, but are we sometimes giving them the wrong idea? More importantly how can we get more options in front of our youth. They need to know that you don’t have to be a celebrity to live a good life. Yes, I agree that parents should be the first role models for their children, but be realistic. In many cases, parents loose cool points just by their children becoming teens (don’t worry parents, you get them back later… with interest). The next best option is to get other people in front of them who they can still see as cool, and who are living the successful lives. The challenge of-course is getting these great “role models” in front of our youth at the rate that athletes, and other entertainers are. I know… that’s probably asking for a too much. Especially when these groups bring in the money. But then again Flavor Flav is on how many attempts at finding his next baby mama?
There are so many reality shows depicting drama and vulgarity. Could we possibly move some of that energy, money and good airtime to show a positive light on some of our local heroes? People like us who do our thing and do it well. I do have that thing with always asking for too much, but I think we could do this. What do you think? How could we make this happen? Share your thoughts and ideas.
I’m just saying though…
Dream Big… Live Bigger…
DrJudiC
www.drjudic.com
