Living The Dream

Because You Only Live This Life Once

Networking with Depression and Anxiety

Networking is fun and exciting. It’s so great to meet new people right?

Well… that is, unless you are battling other issues.

Yes, we’re talking depression. Depression sucks, but you can work through it. When you’re battling depression, your body and mind know that something is wrong, and you may want to do something about it, but the symptoms don’t really take note of how they impact your life. People who suffer from anxiety issues may also experience great stress over getting out there and meeting new people. The simple thought of it can make them sick.

When experiencing depression, people are likely to feel down, sad, hopeless or they may experience a loss of interest in things, including the things they once enjoyed. With such things happening, the thought of going out and being sociable seems anything but exciting. Not to mention the lack of energy you’re also likely experiencing.

If you’re suffering from anxiety, you may even find yourself too physically ill to get out. Yet while all this is going on inside of you, life continues to go on around you.

So what do you do? How do you meet the need to network to advance your budding (or burgeoning) business? You just need to put together the resources to help meet your needs:

 

Know Your Battery Life

Sometimes you may be able to get yourself out and about, but after awhile of putting on that smile, your battery starts to drain, and you begin to shut down again.

Your battery life is that amount of time you can be out and about. It’s how long you can “be on,” where your symptoms may still exist, but you can hold them back enough to get through.  While you’re doing what you need to do to remove your symptoms, it helps to have a few tools to help you manage them until you fully get rid of them.

Take care of yourself. Eat right, eating whether you have an appetite or not. Get enough rest, even if you’re having difficulty sleeping. Take time out to rest your body. It may be that all you can do is meditation or a breathing exercise, but do something to replenish your energy sources. All of these things can help increase your battery life.

 

Set Your Networking Goal

What is it that you want to or hope to accomplish through your networking? This stuff sounds hard, so why are you putting yourself through it? When you know the benefits you’re seeking, they can be used as a source of motivation and empowerment to help you get there.

Before you go into an event, set a goal for that event. It can be meeting three doctors or getting your business card in the hands of four accountants. This way, when you walk in, you can focus on getting that done. You can allocate your time to ensure that this gets done before your battery drains. If you have time remaining, you can then decide to meet more people or give yourself a break and cut out earlier. Either way, you will have accomplished what you came out for.

 

Set Targets

Decide who you are looking to meet who can help you achieve these goals. This helps you eliminate the pressure of having to talk to everyone. Once you know who you’re looking for, then you can conserve your energy a bit instead of exerting too much in random conversation.

 

Be Strategic About Which Events You Attend

Happy hour at the new hottest spot in town may be nice if you’re feeling energetic and want to just hang out with whoever, but when you’re looking to meet with specific people, you need to get to a place that’s likely to have more of them.

If you’re looking to grow your pharmaceutical sales business, then you want to meet with doctors who are prescribing the medications you sell. That’s not to say that meeting a nice VP of sales at a local bank couldn’t be helpful; it’s just that you have a higher likelihood of success in increasing sales by meeting doctors. So instead of going to the general networking meeting hosted by the local Chamber of Commerce, you want to attend the event hosted by the medical association.

Generally, I wouldn’t refer to time spent getting to know any person as “a waste of your time.” However, when working within the limitations of your symptoms, I would call it mismanagement of your limited resources.

 

Take Advantage of Smaller Events

When there are fewer people to interact with, you’re able to be less all over the place and can focus on getting to know one or two people and making that connection. This doesn’t require you to go too far out of your comfort zone.

You can even initiate these types of encounters by reaching out to the people you want to meet. You can call, but in this case, the more probable option may be to reach out in writing through email or—even better—a mailed letter or note. You can send these to your desired contact and advise that you will be calling within a specified time frame. This commits you to making that call, but having sent that initial communication makes getting on the phone easier because you’re not making the ever-so-terrifying “cold call.”

 

Get Involved

When you become engaged in events and make commitments, you get yourself to the point where you have to get to the event. It’s more difficult to back out when others are depending on you.

Take on small but important tasks that will cause you to have to go once you’ve decided to attend an event. It could be something as simple as bringing the name badges or being a friend’s ride. As your battery life gets longer, you can take on more consuming tasks, but don’t overexert yourself at first, because you don’t want to make the experience so overwhelming that it gives you more reason to back out in the future.

 

Attract People

When you don’t have much energy or desire or you’re just feeling down, you’re not really looking forward to going up and striking conversations with new people. The best thing you can do is make them come to you.

Have something unique that makes people want to know more so that they come talk to you. A friend of mine uses a cartoon sticker, which causes people to come up and ask what it’s all about. I write my organization name, “Living The Dream,” prominently on name tags, which makes people come up to ask me about it.

Your attraction piece can be something unique to you or that pulls at the interest of the people you want to meet. Just make sure it’s placed to be seen. This one works great for people who experience anxiety over meeting people or are just shy.

 

Make Information Available

Your business cards are a great way to do this. In addition to your name, title and contact information, they can say things about you that prompt people to ask questions. You can add things like specialties or accomplishments on the back—just three to five one-line bullet points that give people information about you and are great conversation boosters.

 

Follow Up First

You should always do follow-up to maintain that connection with the people you want to keep in your circle. When you follow up first, however, you can set the timing and pace of when the communications happen. You can set the tone and set things up for the best times for you.

When you decide to meet with people, schedule meetings at times that promote the speed you need. When you schedule to meet with someone after hours, they may be rushing home or they may be free as a bird and ready to hang out longer than you can.

Based on your battery life, you can make recommendations. A meeting at the office can last a few minutes or an hour depending on what the parties make of it. Meeting for coffee is shorter than meeting for lunch. Meeting for lunch is more time-limited than meeting for drinks afterwards.

 

Look Great

When you’re preparing to go to a networking event or a meeting with a new contact, it’s also important to get primped up. Looking good promotes feeling good. So put care into your appearance—not so much for others, but for your own sake. Stick with ensembles that you feel good in.

 

Depression and anxiety can take a considerable amount of time to work through. Even when you’ve sought the help of a professional and are working your way out of it, you still have this life that you need to be a part of. So make use of the tools that are available to help you manage.

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MHAM 3- Depression- How You Can Help

Depression is a very difficult experience. Imagine feeling your world imploding around you. It hurts. It bothers you. You feel like an outsider in your own life. You want to fix it, but the task looks unattainable and you don’t have the energy to take it on.

When you’re around people who are depressed it can be depressing. Watching someone you care about becoming more and more disconnected. You want to help but it almost seems that they are rejecting your efforts. It feels like whatever you do is just not enough. You wish they would just snap out of it so you can get back the person you love.

When someone is dealing with depression, it’s bigger then “just snapping out of it”. It may seem like an easy enough task, but it really is not. While it would be much easier to just leave them alone and let them figure it out,  Telling someone to snap out of it will probably make them feel worse. Instead:

Continue to make efforts to engage them in life affirming activities- these are the things that remind them that life is good and why they want to participate in it. They may not seem interested in doing the fun things, but they need it.

Help them make plans to address the issue that contributed to the onset of depression

Engage them in planning for the future- This gives them a reason to want to stick around and be part of life.

Provide opportunities for them to be see that they are valuable- engage them in helping

Reintroduce them to the things they once enjoyed

Keep them connected to important people in their lives- While the tendency in depression is to isolate others- and the average person may not want to be around a depressed person fearing their mood will bring them down too, having people around to work on bringing them out of the funk is very important.

Be patient- depression may not get resolved right away, so be patient and stay determined to be that help

Seek professional- Sometimes we need the help of a professional and that is why they exist. Do the research and find a qualified professional who can provide the needed help. When you do begin to see a professional, remember that the work you do goes beyond the office walls and that the skills you are learning need to be applied out in your life in order for them to truly be beneficial.

Remember- Help is always available… You just have to be willing to seek it out.

I’m just saying though…

Dream Big… Live Bigger…

DrJudiC

MHAM 2- Depression- What You Should Know

When it comes to depression the first thing I want people to know is that it is not just feeling a little blue for a day. Depression is serious condition that the CDC reports affects 10% of adults in the US every year and costs American employers 16 Billion dollars every year in lost work production.

The word depression gets thrown around when a person appears a little sad or others don’t know how to interpret the behaviors they see. Depression is actually a combination of a number of symptoms which for the most part lasted at least 2 weeks. There are two symptoms that are common in depression diagnoses. For a person to be diagnosed with depression they must either have

  1.   Little interest or pleasure in doing things- including the things that they have or generally enjoyed participating in

  2. Feeling down, depressed mood or feelings of hopelessness.

In addition to one of these two people with depression also experience difficulty sleeping, lack of energy or tired feeling, feeling bad about themselves, trouble concentrating, doing thing (including moving or speaking) noticeably slower or are more fidgety and restless than, have thoughts of hurting themselves or think they’d be better off dead. –People who are clinically depressed would most likely have at least 5 of these symptoms.

Depression is often referred to as anger that is directed inwards. There is frequently an event that preceded the onset of depression. Something that occurred which brought on the feelings of sadness or anger that have grown over time. It’s that feeling of seeing something happening a feeling powerless to change it. It’s not that the person really does is powerless to effect, rather it is the feeling or perception of it being so.

Depression is progressive- What can start as a few days of the blues can progress into something more severe if it goes unaddressed for too long. If you notice yourself or someone you know having some of these symptoms- start early to figure out what is causing them and devise a plan for addressing it. Anyone can get a couple days of the gloomies, but depression is an opportunistic illness. When it is given the chance to grow and take over, it will. That’s how felling a little sad over an important loss can turn into months of self blaming depression. The moment you notice it, start tackling.

Depression can happen to anyone and more importantly it can be resolved. It’s not something that happens to certain people, it’s something that happens to any person. Yes, people can take steps to increase resilience and better develop their coping skills to reduce the risk of falling into a full blown diagnosable depression. In order to do that, that has to first be the acknowledgement that depression exists and no one is immune. A history of depressive diagnoses in the immediate family does add an increased susceptibility. What this really means is that you need to be more vigilant and focus strengthening and utilizing your coping skills.

Depression has no real demographic criteria. Everyone is fair game. That’s why we should all check our selves when we notice symptoms and not mislead ourselves in thinking that we’re not the type of people who get this.

I’m just saying though…

Dream Big… Live Bigger…

DrJudiC