Living The Dream

Because You Only Live This Life Once

Five (5) Tips For Boosting A Man’s Self-Esteem

Five (5) Tips For Helping A Spouse With ADD/ADHD

We are used to hearing about how to help children with ADD/ADHD, but the adults they later grow up to be get forgotten. While many children outgrow their ADD/ADHD, most of them don’t. They become adults with ADD/ADHD who go on to have regular jobs, relationships and families that can be impacted by their ADD/ADHD. While I look for a more recent source to cite, until then I will share that an NIMH funded National Comorbidity Survey Replication, estimated the prevalence of Adult ADHD at 4.4% in 2006.

I realize I am a bit long winded for ADHD, but you can catch the summary in starting at 9:22
1. Excellent organization system- With bins and color coding
2. Shared calendars
3. Plan and write things down
4. Gentle reminders but no nagging
5. Build in a time cushions- No more than 5 to 10 minutes

Is Social Media Destroying Your Relationship? Five (5) Ways To Social Media Proof Your Relationship

It is true that social media is a big part of life today. You have to be careful not to allow it to seep into places where it does not belong. Many couples find themselves in relationship troubles because they failed to set limitation. Here are a few things you can do to Social Media Proof Your Relationship.

  1. Respect your relationship and your spouse – Even online you still are in a relationship despite what your relationship status my read. Carry yourself as such. Even when it is easier to do certain things behind the safety of an electronic screen, you should still carry yourself as someone’s spouse just as you do offline. If you wouldn’t do it offline probably shouldn’t do it online.

  2. Do not vent about, criticize, or chastise your spouse on social media– Don’t put your partner on blast like that. Don’t embarrass or bring them shame online. That type of shaming spreads wider and you are less able to take it back. Even if you apologize when you calm down, you still have all those people who know about it- including your primary victim

  3. Avoid living your relationship online– When you tell every little good thing in your relationship, people will be able to tell when things aren’t as hot because you are not posting. That lets people in on your weak spots. You are also allowing people to be involved in parts of your life that should be private. It can also let someone who’s been waiting know that the time to temp has come- maybe for you or your spouse.

  4. Avoid comparing your actual relationship to what you see online. Remember, social media is the poor man’s reality show. People are posting mostly things that make them look better. The posts are more a highlights than actual reality. You don’t know the back stories behind these highlights. You don’t know the sacrifices that are made or what is endured in order to arrive these brief envy-producing moments.

  5. Do not share things about your relationship that your spouse is not comfortable sharing. That is part of respecting your partner. When you are in a relationship it’s no longer just your privacy. Where your lives intersect your privacy becomes shared. If the there is something your partner does ot want shared with others, you should respect that.


Five (5) Tips For Fighting Seasonal Affective Disorder (Winter Blues)

Every year thousands of Americans experience Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) also known as the Winter Blues. It is a form of depression that is generally experienced during the winter months when days are shorter, darker and dreary. On average, 6% of the population experience this in various ranges every year. Fortunately, there are somethings that an individual can to help combat Seasonal Affective Disorder or help a friend who battles the Winter blues.

Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) is a form of Major Depressive Disorder (MDD) that a person suffers during a particular season. Nationally, 6% of the population can be affected with a degree of this disorder, ranging from as low as 1% in the sunnier states to close to 10% in the states with the longer winter. This statistic shows that while SAD is more common in the winter and more prevalent in the areas with longer more dreary winters, but it is not limited to those areas.  These seasonal disorders are different from a regular diagnosis of MDD in that they are only present during the specified season and can at times be relieved even without treatment as the season changes- that being said, you don’t leave them unaddressed and wait for the season to change because they can progress to an ongoing depression or other mood disorders. The intensity of the depression also can be too intense to just wait it out. People experiencing major depression endure severe symptoms that get in the way of their daily functioning and as is common with depression, suicidal thoughts, ideation and even behaviors are possible. If for more than two weeks you are feeling the symptoms of depression or noticing them in a loved one you should be looking at ways to help or getting help.

While I have posted other pieces on depression that include ways to help through depression it is important remember that professional services can be an invaluable resource to help alleviate and even eliminate the symptoms . When dealing with depression it is important to get help and do so right away because ignoring it only gives it time to get more intense. While minor episodes may be worked out through some active efforts at home, you need to be alert and attentive to notice when it is more than you can handle and need to get professional help.

It’s your life- Take control.

Dream Big… Live Bigger…




3 Steps To Help Income Catch Up To Expenses

Everywhere we turn these days someone is talking about the recession. While the economy has affected many business large and small, not every business’ slow down is a result of the external economy. There are several factors that may be affecting an organization’s financial picture, and many of them involve their most powerful resource- Human.

The state of the current economy has allowed for certain things to happen and get blamed on the economy, but there are a few things that should be considered first.

Sales attitude. You have to be able to visualize and believe that the sale can be made and that the contract can be secured. Too many people are going in with a defeatist attitude that may be overt or subconscious. If you believe that because of the economy people will be less likely to buy, then you are allowing yourself some room to not attain your goals by leaving it open that it’s not out of your control. Another down side of this problem is that if you don’t believe the potential client’s decision was result of your presentation then you don’t have as great a need to adjust and improve how you are presenting.

What you can do:

  • Know and understand the value you are pitching. In a recession people may not buy as many things, but they are more welcoming to value
  • Keep track of the feedback and responses that are coming at the end of presentations/meetings and make necessary adjustments
  • If you are the leader of a sales team, take a few meetings with them- This will give you an idea of how your product or service is being presented


Staff behaviors. When business is booming everyone should be working at maximum capacity to meet client needs. When things get slower everyone should still be working just as diligently to get things booming again. This often means that there may be some additional duties for members of the team. You have to establish the importance of this to your team and make sure they understand why that is important to the organization as well as their job security.

Productivity over convenience. There are times when the work load may be more than the staff can handle. As the leader of an organization you need to be able to notice the difference between those times and when you are operating based on habits. When the workload is more than you have staff to handle an option is to use outside companies. You may be sourcing out your printing, copying or packaging during peak times, but when business slows, paying an outsider to do work that can be done by staff already on your payroll may no longer make sense. As a rule, you should only outsource things that cannot be done in-house for less. Calculating this also includes personnel costs.

I’m just saying though…

Dream Big… Live Bigger…